A new Netflix documentary shows Tim Bergling, also known as Avicii, reflecting on how fame impacted him before taking his life at the age of 28 in 2018.
Using hours of haunting footage from friends, colleagues and family, Avicii – I’m Tim offers a harrowing insight into the life of the Swedish DJ.
Directed by Henrik Burman, the 90-minute film includes his first photograph (a scan of a baby taken in 1989) and his last: a photograph of him meditating just days before taking his own life in Oman on April 20, 2018.
It also includes Tim’s own narration of an interview given at the end of his career and follows the superstar DJ from his idyllic childhood in Stockholm to the global fame he achieved with hits such as Wake Me Up and Hey Brother.
But it was the song Levels that really launched his music career and has since been streamed over a billion times on Spotify.
“With Levels everything took off in an incredible way,” Avicii is heard saying in the documentary.
‘I could afford a tour manager, I didn’t have to travel economy class everywhere. I was young, I was hungry. I went from small clubs to big clubs, to theaters and amphitheatres.’
But as his fame grew, so did the number of party invitations he received, and Avicii, who was 22 at the time, began drinking heavily.
A new Netflix documentary focuses on the life of Tim Bergling (pictured), also known as Avicii.
“It was all new and it was a great party,” he said. ‘I realized the magic cure of simply having a few drinks before continuing, which would relax you and turn the experience into a completely different experience.
‘I just took on everything I could. I didn’t even realize before that you could actually play on Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays, but once that opened up you could tour for a whole year.’
Tim, who described himself as an introverted and anxious person, used alcohol to “relax” before going on stage so he could take on Avicii’s “persona.”
“I didn’t like being a person,” he said. ‘I didn’t like having to be Avicii and then having to be Tim. It’s still very confusing, I still don’t really understand it.’
In 2012, Tim was hospitalized with pancreatitis from excessive drinking.
He said: “I had been drinking heavily for a couple of years and the doctors told me: ‘You can’t drink that much anymore, you have to calm down.’ I knew that would probably end up biting me in the butt if I didn’t do anything about it.”
Throughout the documentary, Tim’s closest friends and family add their own narration.
One of the people who spent hours in the studio with Avicii was Geffen Records president Neil Jacobson.
Using hours of haunting footage (pictured) of friends, colleagues and family, Avicii – I’m Tim offers a harrowing insight into the Swedish DJ’s life.
Avicii’s first hit came in 2011 with the song Levels. Since then, it has been streamed over a billion times on Spotify.
In the Netflix documentary, Neil recalled how traveling the world had an impact on Tim.
“I knew the tour was really taking its toll on me. ‘I knew I hated it,’ he said. “It was hard not to notice the size of his team, the mentality he had, the stress he was under, the frustration, getting more and more frustrated.”
Explaining why he was so frustrated with his newfound fame, Tim said: “I was a lot happier before I was famous than after I was famous.”
‘I started to feel very empty and unhappy. I was on autopilot mode. I had just been acting one way because I thought that’s how you’re supposed to act, that’s how you’re supposed to act.’
Although his net worth was estimated at around $50 million when he died in 2018, the DJ acknowledged that “it was never about the money.”
He said: “The only real monetary goal I ever had was the freedom that money gives you and I felt that freedom after I was able to take a taxi wherever I wanted, go out, eat and pay rent.”
‘Just like buying cars, that gives me no pleasure. Artists are people, we’re people who create shit and then get thrown into an environment, an industry, where it’s about determining how many views you have, how many comments.
‘You can’t have a single meeting with someone in the industry without him mentioning 60 different statistics and why this is better than that.
As his career took off, Tim (pictured) was invited to parties and began drinking heavily.
Tim didn’t like touring and turned to alcohol to ‘let loose’ so he could act like his ‘person’ Avicii, according to the Netflix documentary.
‘I was running after an idea of happiness that was not mine. So I didn’t even enjoy making music because it was too much. I don’t know how to fix this.’
Tim’s friend Jesse Waits described how Avicii’s concerts were canceled when his mental health took a nosedive.
“It was hard to see from the outside what the problem was,” Jesse said, adding that Tim’s career had taken off and he had a family that loved and supported him.
“At that moment I realized he was taking painkillers. I think that pushed him back into a deeper hole.
‘When people take opioids, their eyes change and basically become immobilized. The black parts of your eyes turn into little pins. And I could see his eyes wide open like a zombie, you know? And he was just like he wasn’t there.
“For him, he justified it by saying that it suppressed his anxiety, but then it just created more anxiety.”
In his own words, Tim described his anxiety as a “stone in my gut” that was “constantly” there.
Finally, its management team organized an intervention.
Tim struggled with anxiety and turned to painkillers to suppress the feeling.
In the documentary, Tim, also known as Avicii, said: “I didn’t even enjoy making music then because it was too much.” I don’t know how to solve this’
“I went to psychiatrists,” Tim revealed in the documentary. ‘I went to the doctors. I tried so many different diets. I tried to start exercising.
‘My dream would be to be completely comfortable and completely happy with what I already have and not have aspirations of doing a billion more things. I’m trying to find balance. Balance in life with my friends and family.’
After taking a break from his music career, Tim traveled the world and brought his friends with him.
As a result, he said he felt the “same kind of spirit” he felt when he was 18.
“Being free makes me very happy,” he said. ‘By not feeling tied down, without feeling pulled in all directions. When I make music without any expectations.’
During this time, the DJ even tapped into his spiritual side and learned how to do transcendental meditation from his ‘voodoo doctor’.
“He was in a good place,” his friend Jesse recalled. “Like one of the best places I’ve ever seen it.”
In 2018, Tim decided to travel to Oman and made plans to make music upon his return with Geffen Records President Neil.
Tim began meditating and said he returned to the same ‘spirit’ he was in when he was 18 years old.
After his call to arrange a series of recording sessions, Neil said: “We hung up and he flew to Oman and I never thought anything of it.”
“I thought it was a normal Tuesday and that was the last time I spoke to him.”
Tim tragically took his own life near Muscat, Oman on April 20, 2018.
His friend Jesse said, “I really don’t think anyone knows why or what happened.” Nobody knows what was going through his mind. Everyone can speculate.
“He seemed fine with everyone I talked to who was around him. He was in a good place.
‘I’m sure everyone feels that if they had been there they could have changed something. Especially his family.
After his death, Tim’s family released a statement saying: “Our beloved Tim was a seeker, a fragile artistic soul searching for answers to existential questions.
Tim tragically took his life near Muscat, Oman on April 20, 2018.
Avicii fans gather to honor the Swedish DJ in central Stockholm on April 21, 2018.
‘A high-achieving perfectionist who traveled and worked hard at a pace that caused him extreme stress. When he stopped touring, he wanted to find a balance in life so he could be happy and do what he loved most: music.
‘I was really struggling with thoughts about meaning, life and happiness. I couldn’t go on anymore. I wanted to find peace.
‘Tim wasn’t cut out for the corporate machine he found himself in; He was a sensitive guy who loved his fans but avoided the spotlight. Tim, you will always be loved and sadly missed. The person you were and your music will keep your memory alive.
“We love you, the Tim Bergling family.”
In a moving moment in the documentary, American singer Aloe Blacc analyzes the lyrics of the song SOS that he sang as part of Avicii’s posthumous album, Tim, in 2019.
‘Can you hear me, SOS? Help me calm my mind.’
Looking at the lyrics and fighting back tears, the singer said: “It seemed like we had this call for help and I’m getting this letter from Tim too late.”
Avicii – I’m Tim is available on Netflix, along with a recording of his final live performance, Avicii – My Last Show.
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