An etiquette expert has revealed why you should never say “congratulations” to a newly engaged couple.
Alison Cheperdak is an expert in all things formal and proper and frequently offers her advice online.
The Washington DC-based content creator regularly updates her social media followers on how one should conduct themselves at social gatherings.
But one of his latest videos, which has garnered more than 100,000 views, has sparked a fierce reaction.
Alison revealed that friends and family should avoid saying “congratulations” when lovers get engaged because it’s “not an achievement.”
Alison Cheperdak is an expert in all things formal and proper and frequently offers her advice online.
He explained: ‘Saying “congratulations” can imply that the commitment is an achievement.
‘As if one partner “beats” the other, rather than a mutual decision to build a life together.
‘It’s more appropriate to say: “I’m very happy for you both” or “My best wishes.”
Alison explained that this label actually goes back in time.
She said: ‘Traditionally, it was suggested that it was appropriate to congratulate the groom but not the bride. To congratulate a girlfriend was to express surprise at having found love.
‘The idea is to avoid making marriage seem like a prize or a goal to be achieved, but rather it should be based on love and companionship. It is also about treating both members of a couple equally.
“It may suggest that one person is lucky to have secured the other, which may seem like a transaction rather than a celebration of mutual love.”
‘While getting married is important, achievements are often endeavors that require skill or achievement, such as a career milestone or reaching a personal goal.
The Washington DC-based content creator regularly updates her social media followers on how to behave at social gatherings.
Alison revealed that friends and family should avoid saying “congratulations” when lovers get engaged because it is “not an achievement” (file image)
‘Marriage is a shared life decision that represents love and commitment, not a task accomplished.’
Alison pointed out that framing marriage as an achievement suggests that work ethic is the key to finding love when, in reality, it’s not that simple.
She explained: ‘Expressing enthusiasm without the connotations of congratulations.
“Congratulations should be reserved for accomplishments like graduating, getting a new job, or reaching a personal milestone—moments that reflect individual effort and growth, which will be different for different people.”
However, after sharing her opinion on the love affair, she received an avalanche of criticism online.
However, after sharing his opinion on the love affair, he received an avalanche of criticism on the networks.
One person said: “This touches me; I thought congratulations was synonymous with ‘I’m elated for you’ or ‘I’m happy for you.'” This feels nitpicky IMO. (sic)
Another user joked: “I sigh, we’re thinking too much now.” (sic)
Someone else wrote: “I think that’s called overthinking.”
One person asked: ‘How about when people compliment you on a new car? THIS seems very strange to me. Especially if they have incredibly high payouts.” (sic)
Despite a slew of people trolling the etiquette expert, there was one person who agreed with Alison.
The person said: ‘I agree! I’m just saying I’m happy for the couple.’