An American mother living in France has revealed the biggest differences in parenting in the two countries.
Erica Jackson Curran, mother of her seven-year-old son Oliver, discussed contrasting parenting styles during a recent conversation with Business Insider.
He said he noticed that as an American living in Bordeaux, France, he tends to hang around his son in the park, while French parents give their children more autonomy.
The Virginia native also noted that another difference was that French children were generally “impeccably dressed,” even on the playground, unlike American children, who favored more comfortable outfits.
Erica explained that “one of the best places to observe the differences between French and American parenting styles” was French playgrounds.
An American mother living in France reveals the biggest differences between parenting in the two countries
The self-aware mother also admits that American parents “tend to sit still” while their children play.
She shared, “Although my son is pretty self-sufficient at seven years old, I definitely stayed close to him when he was younger, loudly pointing out dangers and reminding him to be careful, being ready to catch him if he fell, and even intervening.” if he encountered a misbehaving child.
“This type of helicopter behavior is quite common among American parents, but less so in France.”
Instead, he noted that French parents tended to remain seated on a bench and gave their children space to explore on their own.
He noted that even when French children wander alone, “they are rarely heard crying” and, at most, only one knee is scraped.
Another thing Erica noticed about French parents was the way they dressed their children.
Erica noted: “Girls usually wear pretty cotton dresses with stockings, ballet flats and matching bows in their hair, while boys wear nice pants and button-down shirts, topped with a sweater or a thick jacket, sometimes even on cool days. warm. (because the French dress more according to the calendar than according to the weather).’
He added that even when French children spend hours playing, they often “still seem so fresh and so clean.”
The mother comically commented that her son could easily be seen in the crowd because he was usually wearing “his comfortable sports clothes: soft sweatpants, t-shirts, hoodies, and sneakers.”
Erica Jackson Curran, mother of her seven-year-old son Oliver, discussed contrasting parenting styles during a recent chat with Business Insider.
Erica joked that her son often sports “short sleeves on cold days, usually with stains somewhere on his clothes.”
The mother admitted that she sometimes received “disapproving looks,” however, she thought it was “important to let (her) son dress how he wants.”
He also believes his son has developed confidence organically by sticking to his style.
Erica continued: ‘Even more importantly, I’m proud that he acknowledged that he dresses differently from his French peers, and is okay with that.
“In fact, he told me that he likes to be different and I love that about him.”
The mother also noticed that French parents rarely yell and confessed that she is trying to implement the same practice.
“Yelling is very common among parents in America, to the point that their children often completely ignore their reprimands,” he said.
‘This is partly why I made the decision to try not to scream even before I had my son, but I still let out the occasional shout: “Careful! Stop it! Five more minutes!”
“And when I do that in France, they stare at me, because French parents rarely raise their voices.”
Instead, he observed that French children were typically “pulled aside and very quietly and severely reprimanded” if they did something wrong.
Erica said she believed the tactic was “much more effective,” adding that she had mostly encountered calm, well-behaved French children.
Erica lives in Bordeaux, France. Pictured is an archive image of the Place du Palais in the city.
The fourth difference Erica noticed was that she rarely saw French children on iPads.
While dining, Erica said she was amazed by the French children who managed to “sit quietly and politely” through hours-long meals, all without an iPad in sight.
Erica shared: ‘This struck me recently at a cafe lunch, where a boy my son’s age ordered beef tartare and spoke quietly to his parents throughout the meal.
“Meanwhile, my son was eating chips, drinking Coca-Cola from a bottle and playing on my phone.”
He continued: ‘But I also feel like it’s a lot to ask an energetic child to sit still for more than an hour in a quiet restaurant.
“And I’m 100 percent okay with letting him have a few minutes of screen time in exchange for allowing my husband and I to enjoy our food and a few minutes of adult conversation.”
A fifth thing Erica noticed was that American children tended to snack more than French children.
The mother mentioned that most American kitchens had “a selection of junk foods in the house, such as chips, sugary cereals, and ice cream.”
But Erica explained that when Oliver invited his French friends over, “they seem genuinely perplexed when he offers them snacks.”
Instead of their teenage friends choosing the junk food options, they usually order milk or fruit.
According to Erica, while American children usually snack throughout the day, French children only snack during ‘le goûter’, at 4:30 pm, when they leave school. Their timely snack is intended to “tie them up until dinner.”
Erica theorized that constant snacking may be the reason why childhood obesity is a bigger epidemic in the United States than in France.
According to the National Children’s Health Survey17 percent of children ages 10 to 17 in the US are obese, while in 2020 survey found that only six percent of children between eight and 17 years old are obese in France.
