One of Australia’s most famous sex workers revealed that she has had worse experiences with men in her personal life than when she worked as a high-class escort.
Amanda Goff, 49, said she suffered more trauma from using her real name than in the decade she spent as “Samantha X.”
Ms Goff started working as an escort in her late 30s, but decided to leave the sex industry last year in an attempt to reclaim her life.
She told Daily Mail Australia that the financial and emotional support she received from clients meant she found it difficult to date as a ‘normal’ woman.
“As Amanda, I’ve been sexually assaulted, stalked, harassed, restrained, and emotionally and physically abused a few times,” she said.
“But as Samantha, I had nothing but clients who were polite, respectful, and sincere. Some have become good friends.’
Amanda Goff, 49, (pictured) said she’s had more trauma as Amanda than the decade she worked in the porn industry under the name ‘Samantha X’
Ms Goff (pictured with her dog) told Daily Mail Australia that the financial and emotional support she received from clients meant she found it difficult to date as a ‘normal’ woman
Ms Goff admitted she was ‘so out of touch’ when it came to navigating the dating world as Amanda because she had enjoyed so much power as Samantha.
“With a client there are boundaries, mutual respect and communication before you meet. There is no sense of being used,” she said.
“Men I have dated think I will be this intimidating, experienced woman who is openly sexual.
‘They assume I’m an expert, that I like to swing. But in reality I am nervous.
“I’m actually very traditional and old-fashioned.”
When Ms. Goff worked as an escort, she felt comfortable with the “snapshots of intimacy” she experienced with her clients.
Now she’s concerned about ghosting and finding the right balance between promiscuity and having clear boundaries – just like any other woman.
‘I do miss the connection. Maybe I should hire an escort,’ she joked.
After Ms. Goff left the escort department last year, she’s worried about ghosting and finding the right balance between promiscuity and having clear boundaries – just like any other woman
Ms Goff said she can understand why women choose to be escorts, but is wary of glorifying the job – which she says carries its dangers
Now that we’re all connected through technology, we’re actually less connected than ever before. We treat each other as if we were disposable items.’
Ms Goff said she can understand why women choose to be escorts, but she’s wary of glorifying the job – which she says has its dangers.
‘To be an escort you have to be mentally strong and have a lot of life experience. This job is not for the faint hearted,” she said.
For her life as a sex worker, Ms. Goff said she had no boundaries, was afraid of offending a man or a date, and didn’t know how to say no.
“No is a complete sentence, it’s important for women to know that,” she said.
She said the dire state of the dating world is also due to men, revealing that many had admitted to her that they “don’t know how to behave around women anymore.”
“They don’t want to be accused of sexual harassment, some are too scared to even look at women these days, they lose their role in society,” she said.
On Monday night, Ms. Goff invited sex workers to share their industry experience with her Instagram fans.
One woman admitted that she felt safer doing FSSW (full-service sex work) in a legal brothel than walking home alone at night.
The woman explained that sex work felt safer than if she had a corporate job where men would make advances or send her inappropriate messages.
Ms Goff agreed that she had more “scary situations” as Amanda than as Samantha X.
Ms Goff became a first-class escort in her late 30s, but decided to hang up her stilettos last year in an attempt to reclaim her life
“People are uncomfortable with that truth, that it’s somehow comforting to think that sex work is a dangerous scary sin,” she said.
“But the man most likely to kill you is your husband.”
For now, Ms. Goff will focus her energies on a number of upcoming ones projectsincluding mentoring, an upcoming novel, and an eight-part series based on her life.
“I don’t know how to be Amanda. I’ve lost the art of going on a normal date,” she said.
‘I like men, they are very simple creatures living in a very complicated world. I love being a woman and embracing my femininity – but do it for yourself, not men.”
