A Spanish mother living in the United States has lifted the lid on parental differences between the two countries, saying Americans focus more on children and less socializing.
Anna Gildersleeve was born and raised in Valencia, Spain, but now lives in Kansas with her American husband, who is a college football coach. The couple, who fell in love while she was studying abroad in the US, had previously resided in New York and Ohio.
The mother of two documents her life and the cultural differences between Spain and the United States on TikTok, where she is @employee He has more than 215,000 followers.
Gildersleeve recently went viral after speaking about her experiences living abroad with kids, saying, “I think being a dad in the States is more boring and isolating than it is in Spain.”
Anna Gildersleeve, who grew up in Spain and now lives in the US, went viral after sharing parental differences between the two countries.
Gildersleeve was born and raised in Valencia, Spain, but now lives in Kansas with her American husband, who is a college football coach.
The mother-of-two documents her life and the cultural differences between Spain and the US on TikTok, where her account_anagildersleeve has over 215,000 followers.
“I think being a mother in the United States is more boring and lonely than it is in Spain,” she said.
She explained that she was inspired to share her thoughts on the subject after speaking to an American mother who thought she was “depressed” but realized she was “in the wrong country” after moving abroad.
Part of the problem, Gildersleeve believes, is the lack of socialization and support in the United States, saying that Americans—particularly parents—”don’t do anything fun during the week after work.”
Monday through Friday, most Americans don’t socialize. She said they go home right after work, or after your kids’ activities, if you’re a parent. In general, Americans save social events for the weekends. They spend a lot of time at home.
“Where in Spain we go out all the time – Monday to Friday, Saturday and Sunday. When the kids finish school, you go to the nearest school playground and you connect with the other parents.
Gildersleeve shared that many stadiums in Spain have bars or cafes attached, saying, “It’s very normal to have a glass of wine or a beer with other parents while the kids are playing on the playground.”
“This is unimaginable in the United States,” she noted.
Gildersleeve noted that American parents don’t socialize with other people during the week, saying they tend to come home right after work.
“In Spain we go out all the time – Monday to Friday, Saturday and Sunday,” she told viewers.
Another difference I noticed is how long it takes you to schedule a US playdate, which needs to be done weeks or sometimes months in advance.
In Spain, she would call her mother’s friend and ask if she wanted to meet in a park with her kids in 20 minutes.
“I feel like most Americans don’t have a village at all,” she said. “Moving around the country is very normal here, but in Spain most people live close to their families.”
The mother also pointed out that American parents revolve their lives around their children, while in Spain the opposite is true.
“Parents in America stop doing what they’re doing — even though they’re having fun — because they need to put their kids to bed at 7 p.m.,” she said. “If you see a kid who is still up after 8 p.m., it’s like, ‘You’re a bad mom.'” ”
Gildersleeve shared that many stadiums in Spain have bars or cafes attached
“It’s very normal to have a glass of wine or a beer with other parents while the kids are playing on the playground,” she said of being a parent in Spain.
Another difference I noticed is how long it takes to schedule a US playdate, which has to be done weeks or sometimes months in advance.
In contrast, Gildersleeve explained that Spanish parents would bring their babies everywhere with them and let them sleep in their prams.
In the US, we separate children’s activities[from]adult activities. She told viewers that parents organize their lives around the children’s schedule, but in Spain, children adjust to the adults’ schedule.
Gildersleeve’s final observation was that women tend to stop hanging out with their girlfriends after they have kids.
“I feel like in the States, when women become mothers, they stop having fun,” she said. Like, yeah, your priorities have changed, but one thing doesn’t replace (the place of) the other. You can go to a bar or club, have a couple of drinks with your best friends, and still be a good mom.
Gildersleeve’s video has been viewed more than 2.2 million times and has received over 7,500 comments. Many people, including Americans, agreed with her assessment.
The mother explained that “parents organize their lives according to the children’s schedule” in the United States, while “the children adapt to the adults’” schedule “in Spain.
Gildersleeve’s video has been viewed more than 2.2 million times, and many people, including Americans, have agreed with her rating.
We couldn’t agree more! I lived in Spain for a year and loved that we did things during the week! I hate living on weekends,” one wrote.
“America is isolating in general. I don’t have kids and spend most of my time alone. It’s just so sad,” said another person.
Another added, “I agree with your point, I was born/raised in the US and Spain seems fun for parents!”
A number of people have pointed out that Americans tend to be overworked and stressed, which is why they often live on weekends.
I think it’s because people in Western Europe don’t have to work as hard as people in the United States. A lot of people feel stressed and overwhelmed here,” concluded one viewer, and Gildersleeve agreed.
She responded, “Most people work crazy hours and get drained after work.” “It’s sad to be honest.”
