If you’ve ever been tempted to scroll through your own social media profiles and imagine what others might think of your life, you’re not alone.
According to author and psychotherapist Eloise Skinner, it is a perfectly natural phenomenon that many people indulge in.
And the explanation why is intriguing. Basically, everything is rooted in our desire to learn more about who we are as people.
“The desire to understand how we are perceived has been present in human instinct for generations,” said the mental health professional.
‘As we try to understand ourselves, answering the eternal question of who am I? —we often turn to the opinions and reflections of others to guide us.’
Looking at our own social networks is a way of trying to understand our identity, explained a psychologist.
And when these comments are not immediately available, Ms. Skinner explained to MashableWe try to imagine what it might be by examining what others would see when looking at our social media profiles.
This need for acceptance and social status has been shaped over the years by evolution, adds psychologist Zoe Mallet.
As a result, all humans have a deep-seated need for social approval that is only amplified by social media.
“It is a subconscious attempt to improve our social position, increase our chances of belonging and create a positive image of ourselves, which is part of our survival mechanisms as human beings,” Mallet said.
Stalking one’s social media is simply another way to control others’ perceptions of oneself, he explained.
The act can also be a way of trying to make sense of the past, leaving us unable to move forward with the present.
For others, however, self-bullying may be rooted in perfectionism.
“It could be due to a feeling of insecurity about our sense of identity, how others see us, or even a critical feeling about what we post and where we should improve,” Ms Skinner said.
“There’s a greater awareness of how we compare ourselves to others online – in other words, it’s easier to compare our digital lives to someone else’s, to see what we like and don’t like.”
For most, this is harmless, but for some it can become a harmful concern.
“Social media can act as a storage unit for older versions of ourselves and our identities, so reflecting with appreciation, nostalgia or thoughtfulness can be a beneficial and supportive activity,” Ms Skinner added.
But if self-bullying leaves you too wrapped up in the past, be careful.
“If it makes us more self-conscious, self-absorbed, or distracted from whatever we’d like to use social media for, it’s worth rethinking the habit,” he said.
“When we post, the responses we receive validate us and we receive a dose of dopamine,” Dr. Mallet added.
‘We want that hit again and again, so of course we will return to the source where we experienced it before.
‘It’s not that we are addicted to looking at our own Instagram. We are addicted to the feeling we get when we do it.
A whopping 56.2 million people in the UK are active on social media and spend an average of one hour and 49 minutes on different platforms each day.
But experts have warned that spending too much time on social media can have negative effects on mental health, especially among young people.
Several studies have found a strong link between heavy social media use and an increased risk of depression.
And recent US data shows that teenagers who spend more than three hours a day on social media have twice the risk of anxiety symptoms.
In 2023, the average daily usage for this age group was 4.8 hours.
According to studies, more than half of teenagers also say that regularly browsing social media makes them feel bad about their bodies.
