Stephanie Matto, 34, is a television personality known for her appearance on the TLC reality show ’90 Day Fiancé’ in 2020. She wrote a revealing memoir, ‘Empty Blood,’ about her experiences.
This year, like every other year, I’m hosting a big family Thanksgiving at my home in Connecticut.
My mom and stepdad are coming and some of our relatives are even flying in from the Czech Republic to celebrate with us.
I’ll be elbow-deep in a turkey in the kitchen most of the day, cooking a traditional feast. There will be champagne, pumpkin pie and yams galore.
But one thing will not be the same: this year my brother is not coming.
In fact, it is prohibited. I won’t let him come, not after he voted for Donald Trump.
At 24, my brother is a decade younger than me, but we have always been very close. He lived with me for a while and talked all the time.
I’ve been lucky and certainly had successes in life, so I’ve always been happy to support him financially: I bought him a BMW when he turned 21, I pay his phone bill, and when he asks me for $50, I’ll send him $100.
But a few months before the election, it changed.
Stephanie Matto, 34, is a television personality known for her appearance on the TLC reality show ’90 Day Fiancé’ in 2020. She wrote a revealing memoir, ‘Empty Blood,’ about her experiences.
I’ll be elbow-deep in a turkey in the kitchen most of the day, cooking a traditional feast. There will be champagne, pumpkin pie and yams galore. But one thing will not be the same: this year my brother (left) is not coming.
He began sending me right-wing news and social media posts peddling conspiracy theories, all of which I tried to debunk or verify.
It was terrifying. I felt like my brother was being brainwashed. You see, my family has always been liberal. My mother and I are proud Democrats and I guess I always assumed my brother would follow our example.
I warned him that young men are increasingly the target of fake news on social media and not to believe everything they read and see.
But he didn’t listen, he had gone too far down the rabbit hole.
Still, in early November, he told me and my mother (with whom he lives and who also helps him financially) that he was going to vote for Green Party candidate Jill Stein.
My mother and I tried to explain to him that he would basically be wasting his vote, but we didn’t try to stop him. After all, it was their choice, and Connecticut is a safe, blue state.
But on election night we discovered that he had lied: my brother had voted for Trump.
When the results came in, he couldn’t contain himself as he boasted about how Trump had won and how “good” he would be for the country.
My mother is a self-made woman and a proud feminist: she moved to the United States from the Czech Republic when I was seven and has built a successful life for herself.
When Trump won again, she was devastated that a man found responsible for sexual assault could be elected president.
It was terrifying. I felt like my brother was being brainwashed. You see, my family has always been liberal. My mother and I are proud Democrats and I guess I always assumed my brother would follow our lead. (In the photo: Matto with his brother).
He began sending me right-wing news and social media posts peddling conspiracy theories, all of which I tried to debunk or verify.
My brother made fun of her, essentially bragging about it until she started crying. She was so angry that she kicked him out of her house at night and he had to go live at his girlfriend’s house.
My mother has never been able to stay mad at my brother for long, so she let him come back the next day. And since she forgave him, I decided to ignore the situation completely and move on. I didn’t even mention it to him.
But then, out of nowhere, he texted me saying, “Trump won, this is going to be great for Bitcoin.”
That was the last straw. He was furious. How can we not see how terrible all this is?
It was a slap in the face. He has two women in his life, my mother and I, who have taught him to respect women. His mother is an immigrant and we both support him generously. But he voted against our best interests and everything we stand for, and then had the audacity to rub it in our faces.
I blocked his number and told my mother he was no longer welcome at my house for Thanksgiving. If he shows up, I’ll fire him.
My mother desperately wants me to forgive him. But I’m not ready to have that conversation and I don’t know when I will be.
The problem with my brother is that he is so used to getting what he wants that he doesn’t respect our opinions and feelings.
Then I said to myself: ‘not this time’.
I blocked his number and told my mother he was no longer welcome at my house for Thanksgiving. If he shows up, I’ll fire him.
I don’t intend to disown my brother, that would never happen, but I do need to teach him a lesson.
He needs to know that he can’t make our mother cry and then expect me to open the door and welcome him with open arms. That’s not how life works.
When he’s ready, if he comes to me and apologizes and can explain why he voted for Trump, maybe we can work it out. But that won’t happen before Thanksgiving.
Recently, I shared what happened in a TikTok post and the response was surprising.
Many people came to my defense, including some Trump supporters, who said the way he had treated my mother was disgusting.
I think there’s a general feeling among Democrats now that we’ve stopped being nice: If you voted for Trump, great, you got what you wanted. But you have to accept the consequences, whatever they may be.
It’s a new attitude, and it basically applies to my brother too: screw around and find out.