A leading gynecologist has said men should do more to help women who say they are experiencing a loss of sexual desire after the birth of a child or as they approach menopause.
Dr. Jen Gunter, author of the best-selling books The Vagina Bible and The Menopause Manifesto, spoke with host and DJ Annie Mac on the latest episode of her Changes podcast.
The Canadian gynecologist explained that lost desire can often be regained, but that it requires effort on both sides, something that, according to her, men sometimes go unnoticed.
On the latest episode of DJ Annie Mac’s Changes podcast, Canadian Dr. Jen Gunter talked about desire in women and got candid about the role men play in it.
The health professional said: “We are all sold this narrative that in a heterosexual relationship women are hot and horny all the time, in the blink of an eye from a man’s touch… but desire needs be cultivated.”
She continued, “When someone tells me they don’t have any desire, I always say, ‘What has your partner done in the last month to cultivate desire in your relationship?'”
‘For some people, desire appears after their partner has introduced them to sexual relations. That’s called receptive desire and it’s normal.
He said it differs from lack of desire in which women struggle to become aroused, even during sexual activity.
The Canadian gynecologist said many men were mediocre at trying hard to satisfy their partners.
Mic drop… Dr. Gunter told listeners, “It’s really important that we don’t medicalize women to compensate for incompetent men.”
Speaking about perimenopause, the period before menopause begins, Dr. Gunter, a native of Winnipeg who regularly speaks about women’s physical and mental health, added: “It’s really important that we don’t medicalize women to compensate. to incompetent men.”
Former Radio 1 star Annie responded to the comment by saying: “Drop the mic!”
Dr Gunter, whose latest book, Blood, looks at menstruation, continued: ‘TThere are a lot of mediocre men out there, and there are a lot of mediocre men out there, and often when people have been with someone for 20 years, the cracks start to appear.
She explained, “Maybe you’ve been really busy with kids and other things, and now you finally have time to focus on your relationship, but if you haven’t focused on your relationship for a long time, it’s hard to leave.” from 0 to 60 overnight, right?
‘So it’s important to think about it holistically. Everyone uses this word “holistically,” but what it really means is looking at the whole person and looking at everything.
From the comments on Annie’s Instagram page, many women said they could relate.
One wrote: ‘Mike drops and she’s spot on. Desire is cultivated.’
Another added: ‘I love that you talk about all the nuances of why things can happen and not just pushing a hormone to “fix” things.
“If you’re stressed, not sleeping, and eating like crap, the sex drive probably isn’t going to be there.” Does this mean you need testosterone? Or better self-care?
One person joked: ‘Ooooooooooooh I can almost hear those mediocre men getting upset about this!’
Another added: “I would like this on a t-shirt please.”