28-year-old woman in a relationship with a man 48 YEARS older than she says she cries over the age difference
A 28-year-old who is dating a man 48 years her senior admits strangers regularly mistake her for her 76-year-old boyfriend’s caregiver – but she insists the couple are blissfully happy despite her. fear that he will die in a few months. a few years.
Kelsey Hopeful, from La Jolla, San Diego, met widower Guy BonGiovanni, from Anchorage, Alaska, in a yoga class – which he attended in hopes of finding some inner peace after the devastating loss of his wife of 42 years.
After having a conversation after class, teacher Kelsey and photographer Guy quickly became close friends – and while they now admit there was an immediate attraction between them, they say it wasn’t love at first sight.
Over the next two years, however, Guy and Kelsey’s friendship began to develop into a romance – and the couple are now in a live-in relationship, despite admitting to being criticized from family members for their wide age difference. .
Unlikely romance: a 28-year-old woman has opened up about her relationship with an age difference with a man 48 years older
Sparks: Kelsey Hopeful, 28, and boyfriend Guy BonGiovanni, 76, met in a yoga class – which he took to try to overcome the loss of his wife of 42 years
Kelsey and Guy now share good times together, whether it be plays, taking walks or exploring new cities and states. For Kelsey, however, these wonderful moments were laced with grief because she knows she is unlikely to grow old with the love of her life.
During the first year of their relationship, Kelsey did not tell anyone she had met Guy – concerned that her friends and family would react negatively to the news that she was seeing a man nearly half a century older than her.
However, Kelsey has gradually learned the art of not worrying about what others think and in the spring of 2020 she decided to tell her family about their relationship one by one.
According to Kelsey, the hardest thing to tell was the 76-year-old grandmother – who herself was married to a much older man and struggled with the loss of the love of her life in the 26 years since his death.
When out together, Kelsey and Guy admit that strangers may think she’s his caretaker, but when they’ve introduced themselves as a couple, they thankfully haven’t received any snarling comments. This is something Kelsey believes is because strangers realize how happy they are together regardless of their age difference.
“On a Thursday night, I decided to try something new and opted for a yoga class at my local gym,” said Kelsey. ‘I started to explore my environment and the people in the classroom.
Eventually my eyes came into contact with a man who I thought was actor and comedian George Carlin. He took his mat and pushed it next to me. I thought, “Uh oh.”
Built slowly: The duo initially formed a friendship, but over the course of two years they developed romantic feelings for each other
Under cover: Kelsey admits she kept her romance a secret for a year, fearing her family and friends would judge the age difference
Fears: She was especially concerned about telling her grandmother – who is the same age as Guy – because she also married an older man and was heartbroken when he died
When class was over, Guy asked if I wanted to be his friend. I was shocked because it was a simple question, one that I have seen children ask other children.
‘We talked alone in that gym for two hours and when he said goodbye, he just walked away. No phone numbers were asked, no last name, no guarantee we would ever see each other again. That’s how our story began.
‘It was not love at first sight, but more of a recognition of each other.
We took the time to walk our way to love. At first, the appeal of me was the sound of his voice and his ability to tell a story. I could listen to him for hours.
‘In the first steps of our relationship, I only cried about our 48-year age difference.
“We had great times watching plays, going for walks, or finding pastry shops, but the tears would come.
‘I remember eating pastries in Santa Monica and I started crying in front of him and not because I had just tasted the best rum ball in my life, but because I experienced joy on a different level and then I suddenly remembered that he is 48 years older than me and that he has fewer summers ahead of me than I do.
I tell him now when I’m afraid of losing him because one day there will come a time in my life when he won’t be with me anymore and I want him to know now that I was always open and honest with him and that he feels my appreciation and love. I pray for that every day.
Oops: Kelsey and Guy say they are blissfully happy – despite admitting strangers will mistake Kelsey for her boyfriend’s caretaker
Upset: Special Education teacher Kelsey also admits she cried about their age difference because she knows it means Guy is more likely to die than her
Opening up: “I’ll tell him now when I’m afraid of losing him because one day there will come a time in my life when he won’t be with me anymore,” she explained.
Guy, who is old and wise, tells me there is no point in crying about death until it happens and that we should be here now and love each other as much as possible.
“As the friendship blossomed to the fact that we became lovers, it was important to me that we keep the opinions of others out of my ears, especially in the beginning.
‘When we first met, I was a person who was concerned about the opinions of others and who pleased people.
‘I didn’t tell anyone during the first year of our relationship.
After I got to know Guy, he became my biggest motivator to learn how to live more to my heart and not be afraid to be who you are.
‘I knew I should learn how not to worry about the rules of society and what others think of me or why they think I’m in a relationship with an older man.
When it came time to share with my family about my relationship with Guy, it was because of the pandemic.
‘The COVID-19 virus mainly infected the elderly and I was concerned, so I chose to discuss our relationship with my family one by one.
“The most complicated conversation for me was with my maternal grandmother, because she fell in love with a man 18 years older and has been his widow for 26 years.
In my teens she confided in me that sometimes she wished she could have found a companion to spend more time with her.
Bond: The couple share a passion for the outdoors and regularly go out for walks together
Lessons: Kelsey says Guy taught her not to fear age
Inspiration: “ He is the most important person in my life and the best example of how to age healthily and be happy at every stage of your life, ” she said
‘I think I felt I would be just like her, with only one love in my life.
“ When we’re out in public, chances are people from a distance will think I’m Guy’s caretaker.
Even when we explain that we are a couple, we have not received any snarling comments or facial expressions of disgust.
“We are better together and I think people feel that when they meet us and see how happy we are.”
For Kelsey, one of the best things about being in an age gap relationship is learning to appreciate the time the couple spend together and all the previous fears she had of growing old have almost disappeared since meeting Guy. The couple is inseparable and is even considering getting married.
“Another benefit of our age difference is that we think about what my current time on Earth is worth,” said Kelsey.
Guy has an ocean of life experiences, but he shares his wisdom with spontaneity and caring.
“He is the most important person in my life and the best example of how to age healthily and be happy at every stage of your life.
“I’m no longer afraid of growing into an old woman.”